Date night

Grocery List: Chocolate chips, caramels, German chocolate cake mix, canned milk, butter

I made some love brownies. I purchased all of the ingredients, planning to make them for a boy. The day I bought the stuff he asked my roommate on a date. This is when I wish I was brave enough to shove my finger down my throat to throw up the hurthateconfusionhurthurtsadWORTHLESSNESSdistress. I wish... That would be my vice: self-induced vomiting during extreme stress.

I made them anyways. I gave a plate of love brownies to three boys.

My roommate just got home from a four and a half hour long date. Then they stayed in my frontroom and chatted with the rest of the roommmates. Throw up, please, bring that stomach flu back pleasepleaseplease. I took an hour-long shower and they still weren't done.

I have a great dislike for this girl who is loud and bossy and mean and whiney and I wish I could be like Christ. But I am just Tori, the not-even-a-contestant.

So I write on my blog and listen to Beethoven. When they first came over, I laid in my bed and listened to classical so I wouldn't hear the loudness that happens when this girl.... whatever. I drowned in music. I was drowning. Then I showered and sang: sometimes I have two options: sing or cry. I sang. I had to ask my preteen brother for advice. It was not too helpful.

I need to sleep, though now my roommate is outside at the vanity. If I leave my room, she'll be chipper and ask how my night was. Or whine at me. I think I'd rather pee my bed. Decisions decisions...